Form News
9:00am and court is in session. Presiding is the honourable judge Mrs Ford in the case of 10B vs the teachers of PHHS.
On the witness stand are the members of the orchestra, C Keyes, H Burtch and R Melvanin who denies charges of
joining the New York Philharmonic Orchestra just to miss periods.
Next to testify are our basketball heroes, namely A Davies and P Fitzslmmons (our Students' Council Rep) and B Jiggins
and B Burley (our BAA Rep) who are found guilty of fifty charges of ignoring homework.
Next on the stand we hear a sobbing Miss Holcroft tearfully relate how D Hills, P Long and J McDonald cause her many
a sleepless night.
Following next, we have our pro actor D Fenton confess that he left school for Hollywood.
Also testifying on charges of homework undone because of their sports life, we have our feminine basketball group
consisting of C Keyes, K Oliver and J Rowden.
Next teacher to testify is Miss Donohue who charges P Long, D Hills and J McDonald, lOB's big three, with first degree
nuisancy.
Now we see our unbeaten intramural team composed of H Kowal, R Doust, R Melvanin, B Huk, D Fenton, D Hills
and J McDonald who are freed from the custody of the teachers to join the Globetrotters. Cheerleaders P McMahon and J
Rowden confess to having cheered for the handsome opponents.
Among our amateur 'Stars of the stage' we have D Fenton, R Doust, H Burtch, B Burley, P Long, B Jiggins, N Skinner,
P Dennys, A Davies and H Kowal who also denies charges of sneaking away to Hollywood. Incidentally, our director for
the play in which these students will be playing will be W Babando (our Math scholar). Confessing to charges of
counterfeiting our school books, we have our library club members namely D. Bell (soccer champ) and J Trew.
To be found helping Mrs Winterton are N Skinner, V Sanders, J Rowden, C Wakely and M Sylvester
who confess to having baked the lovely cakes for the teachers who did not know they were poisoned.
Last on our list is J
Bartholomew, one of our top English students who denies selling questions and answers.
By this brief summary we can conclude that crime doesn't pay because we are sentenced to three more years in PHHS.
Rick Doust
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